The 11 Things Nobody Tells You About Self-Care

I write so you share. Thank you.

The idea of self-care is a wonderful one, and for many people, it can be a necessary part of coping with struggles such as anxiety.

Self-care also encourages reflection and provides an opportunity to learn about yourself through introspection.

Unfortunately, the same mentality that makes self-care seem like a good idea (the belief that care = more love) leads some people to believe that when they don’t engage in self-care, they are being unloving or uncaring towards themselves. It can also lead you to believe that care = feeling love, which is very different from the reality of the situation.

These are very common sentiments, certainly among many people who understand the concept of self-care but don’t know how to actually do it.

11 things that people often don’t know about self-care

1. Self-care is not about “caring about yourself” at all. Self-care is about taking care of yourself, which means that it might seem to others that you are putting “love” into the relationship with yourself, but really, you are just being self-respectful and responsible.
2. Self-care does not have to include a lot of emotionality or time spent thinking about your feelings.
3. It may be possible to take care of yourself without paying close attention to how you feel. We’re not always able to inner-connect and self-explore. We’re very busy! The idea sometimes is to let go of the struggle to feel a certain way and just get on with your day. Keep it simple.
4. Self-care is not about taking care of other people in order to take better care of yourself. It’s about taking care of yourself as an end in itself and as a way to contribute something to other people.
5. Self-care does not have to be expensive, time-consuming, or complicated. Often, the smallest gestures can make a big difference.
6. Self-care is not something you do only when it feels right and when you’re in the mood unless taking care of yourself is a rare treat for you. But if self-care were a treat, then perhaps it would be better to think of it as an occasional opportunity rather than a daily hassle.
7. Self-care is not something you do to show others how much you love them, and it’s not a way to convince yourself that you are “good” or “worthy.”
8. Self-care requires an investment of time and energy. It also requires a certain degree of maturity. This doesn’t mean that everybody is capable of taking care of themselves all the time, but self-care IS a skill that can be learned, developed, and practised.
9. Self-care is not something that you do because you feel guilty, and it’s not something you choose when it seems like the easiest or most convenient thing to do.
10. Self-care is not something that requires a lot of emotional work or heavy thinking. It is not so much “self-examination” as it is simply looking around and noticing what you need, and taking care of that need.
11. Self-care does not require the presence of others with whom you can share your thoughts and feelings, or talk about how things are going with yourself.

Conclusion

I hope this list helps you to understand more about self-care.

Self-care can be a wonderful concept to help people cope with their struggles, and it is extremely rewarding to see a person who is taking good care of themselves. But it’s also important to understand that taking care of yourself will not always feel right or be easy, and that self-care is not something that you do for anybody else but yourself.

Love,
Patri